LOST? CONFUSED? ALONE? UNSURE WHAT TO DO WITH YOUR PROBLEMS AND LIFE? YOU NEED  DEAR CTHULHU PATRICK THOMAS  author Dear Cthulhu
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 Dear Cthulhu,       Is it true that you are doing an advice column? If so, where is it appearing? Why are you doing it? How can I write to you? Why do you think you're qualified to give human advice?     -Curious in Cleveland     Dear Curious,         Yes, it is true. Look for DEAR CTHULHU columns in magazines, including Dig This Real, Tales of the Talisman, Nth Degree, The Realm Beyond, Space & Time online,  and past issues of CTHULHU SEX,  BLOOD MOON RISING, WEREWOLF MAGAZINE,  and ABYSS AND APEX.  C.J. HENDERSON’S FANTASY MAGAZINEThe columns from 2005-2009 have been collected by Dark Quest Books in the collections DEAR CTHULHU: HAVE A DARK DAY and DEAR CTHULHU: GOOD ADVICE FOR BAD PEOPLE.          As  to why I'm doing it, every time I look around this world Earth, I see things are falling into chaos. I plan to do my part to help. Plus, I seem to have some extra time on my hands until certain stars align again.     Write me at DearCthulhu One of my minons will notify you by e-mail if your insignificant request is choosen. Please note that all letters become the property of Dear Cthulhu. If you don't like that, don't write.  As to my qualifications, they are too numerous to list. Question me again and I will devour your soul.      Have A Dark Day™
Murphy’s Lore, Dear Cthulhu, Mystic Investigators, Terrorbelle, Fairy With A Gun, Swords of the Daemor, Nemesis & Co., DMA, Agent Karver, Hell’s Detective, The Infinite jester, Graveyard Angel, Hexcraft, Crimson Midnights, Startenders, The Mystacuast, Soul For Hire, Bulfinche’s Pub, Murphy’s Lore After Hours and all related characters are copyright and TM Patrick Thomas. All rights reserved.
Dear Cthulhu strongly suggests you support the magazines that carry Dear Cthulhu.
The Dear Cthulhu Collections from Dark Quest Books
- “FUN.” - Nick Cato,   THE HORROR  FICTION REVIEW “Dear Cthulhu provides the finest  advice to needy readers. Lord  Cthulhu is the greatest and mightiest provider of guidance for mere  mortals. Dear Abby is like unto a flea  on His behind in comparison. Dr.  Phil is but carbuncle upon one of His mighty appendages. All hail Great  Cthulhu, eldest of the Old Ones, and  your ONE source for sound advice.  If you want to stay out of Arkham  Asylum, Dear Cthulhu is your only  hope.”   – Hildy Silverman,  Publisher, Space and Time  Magazine
"Dear Cthulhu is the first step  toward enlightenment, by way of  electro-convusive therapy.   I've  been reading Dear Cthulhu for  years! The doctors say I may never  recover.  Dear Cthulhu is better than  a sandblaster to your crotch and  twice as fun!"  -Michael Amorel,   Publisher Cthulhu Sex   When Cthulhu approached me to  write an advice column for my 'zine,  I was a bit skeptical. But how could I  to say no to mighty Cthulhu? I mean  really, he was mad enough when I  told him he could only have one  page. But it turned out to be the  best page in the entire 'zine.  Absolutely. The BEST! Now can I  please be released from my  enslavement in the blurb mines, oh  great one?  -Michael D. Pederson,   Publisher/Editor, Nth Degree 
“More action-packed than Jerry Springer re-runs, yet safer than being aboard a train wreck. This is sofa therapy at its best.”    “Dear Cthulhu has singlehandedly upset entire sects of people in South America…”  “How was I supposed to know that it was unhealthy to sleep with a C.H.U.D.? No one gives better advice or dishes it so real as Dear Cthulhu…”   - Samantha “edie” Collins, editor of Dig This Real magazine “Basically it’s a Dear Abby for the Mythos-addicted, and it’s meant to be a quick and fun read — which it is.” - Nancy Greene,  Flames Rising